Demons
by XxReddShadowxX
Summary: With what the shark has done, he knows he cannot hide the monster that he knows he has become. He has hurt the dolphin, something his will never be able to erase. There are regrets. There are monsters. There is sadness. There is pain. But there is also forgiveness. [T]/Yaoi/Multi-chapter/Songfic-ish/


**A/N: Based off of the song Demons by Imagine Dragons.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Free! or any of its characters, nor do I own the song.**

* * *

It was the dead of summer in Australia, the sun blistering down on the poor souls who dared step outside that day. Almost everyone was in fear of spontaneous combustion the moment they revealed themselves to the unbearable heat, and so everyone was indoors.

Everyone except for a red-haired, shark-toothed hormonal teenage swimmer boy by the name of Rin Matsuoka.

The temperature played no part in his mood, even if he was sweating to death in a black tank-top sitting on the scorching sand of a small beach. Really, the heat was unnerving, seeing as the sun was already setting and there was no sign of it cooling off. But he didn't care. He was thinking.

It might have been warm, but he couldn't help but feel that part of him was missing, and that only made the days become unbearably cold. It was hard. And he knew very well what he was missing, he just refused to say anything to anyone about it.

Yes, his dream (or rather his father's dream) was to travel to Australia to train for the Olympics, but with what he left behind, he began to doubt that it was really worth it in the first place. Both sides outweighed each other in different aspects.

It was either his career, his swimming.

Or it was where it heart was, where it has always stayed, with Haruka Nanase.

Rin slashed a hand through the water angrily. He couldn't help to think that it wasn't it fault, but it was because his entire life had merely dealt him a bad hand, and all of his cards folded. There was nothing he could do about it.

But then, he thought, there was something he could have done about it. He could've stayed. He could've stayed and been with Makoto and Nagisa, but most importantly, with Haruka. When he thought about it, it only made it seem as if it was all completely his fault.

He had ruined his only true relationships.

He had ruined his own emotions and strangled his own heart.

He had ruined his life, even when he thought he was only trying to make it better.

Realization hit him hard, and he was glad that his only companion at the time was the night sky. Silver rivulets of water streamed down his face through garnet-colored eyes, and he tucked his chin between his knees ashamedly. Even the moon seemed to mock him at the time, just sitting there, allowing him to bawl in front of him with it's calm and beauteous demeanor.

Much like a certain raven-haired, blue-eyed male he knew too well.

Among all the saints Rin saw at that moment, all were made of gold, all of the idols he had ever looked up to, there wasn't a single modest soul. They had all vanished behind the veil of greed and gluttony that shaded over the swimmer's life.

And he was only one of them now, it seemed.

His dream to become an Olympic swimmer had lost its appeal to the male Matsuoka. In fact, every dream he had seemed to have lost its spark to him. It seems that the only one that mattered, which was going back to the way it was, the way it could have been. It was impossible, he'd mauled the past beyond recognition without even knowing. Without thinking.

His dreams had simply failed, vanished. And the ones that he had left, of becoming a great swimmer, were the only ones left. The only one people expected him to do now. It looked to them as if it were the best choice.

But now, they were the worst of all of them.

With everything he left behind, he shed a tear.

For his friends.

For his dreams.

For his real self.

For his compassion.

For Haruka.

It felt as if the blood had all run stale, like there was no need for ambition or aspiration anymore. Competition and the whole aspect of winning in general had lost it's golden sheen to Rin, something completely unpredicted.

He was going back to Japan, back to Haruka.

Thinking back to the last time he had seem him, he choked out another sob. He had run away from him, just because he'd lost in a silly, stupid race. Oh, what Rin would give now to relive that just so that he could see Haruka again. Not that he'd say it out loud, but he missed him more than ever right now. He could only be so attached to something, but Haruka seemed to surpass all of those other thoughts.

Rin would go back to Japan.

Rin would find Haruka.

Rin would never leave him, never again. He would say sorry, he would tell him that he loves him and never let him feel abandoned again. Ever.

Rin didn't want to feel abandoned, either. Never again.

He would hold the brunet in his arms and tell him that he regrets every decision, every thought, every breath that he let himself take when he decided to go to Australia instead of staying with him.

Rin wanted to make this all right again, but he wanted to hide the truth behind it. He didn't want to reveal that his weakness was Haruka all along, but still shelter Haruka from the heartbreak that was only his fault in the first place.

It's not like he could anyways, he knew that he was a monster. He was a beast.

Rin knew that he couldn't hide from the past.

There was nowhere left to run. There was nowhere left to hide.

Rin was going to have to face his most terrible fear, which happened to also be hosted by his most passionate love.

Rin Matsuoka was going to reunite himself with Haruka Nanase.


End file.
